One thing I've learned from my own mistakes as well as from other people is that if you put too much information out there about yourself there is no mystery. Some people will take advantage of knowing too much about you and put up a false front because they know exactly what it is you are looking for. By the time true colors come shining through you’ve already invested time and heart strings, and then comes the dilemma of dealing with the real person for the love of the one you fell in love with or just moving on.
After my relationship that had formed online ended I decided to try again. Scary. I didn’t put out as much information about myself and what I was looking for this time. I came in contact with this guy who was super and nice and sweet, a little clingy which I find annoying but with time it becomes tolerable. A few days into talking to each other he found me on Facebook and I accepted his friend request. Then the fun started. Within a day he starts telling me that I am now his girlfriend and he wanted me to delete all the other men on my Facebook page and did not want me talking to any other men at all. Whoa!! What!! It hasn’t even been a week since we started talking and we haven’t even met! Deleted and Blocked.
I’ve known people who have successful relationships from meeting through online dating. Typically it seems they actually talked online for quite awhile before meeting, some for weeks, some months and some years. One of my favorite online love stories was recently posted by my friend Dinosaur Mommy in her post A Borrowed Blog. At first look it is long, but it's so worth the read, even though I already knew how it would end I was on the edge of my seat the entire time hoping they would end up together.
Taking it slow and getting to know each other probably sounds less appealing for some people who are lonely. However a major advantage is people are much more open via online correspondence than they are in person. This works with friends as well. If you are a virtual chatter you probably find that you end up telling your friend who you speak to online through instant messengers, emails, and other services, even text messaging more than what you tell your friends who you spend more time with hanging out in person. This isn't the law for everyone, I just know a lot of people are like this. And I do not see how actually getting to know someone before investing your time and heart into them can be a bad thing.
In this cyber age I am sure we will all hear more and more stories from our friends about how they met their one and only online. Do you online date? Have you had a success story or find yourself with failure after failure?
Much love and many wishes for relationship success!
If you are looking for a book to help, you will find that Amazon has many Dating Books for advice and stories etc for great prices, and many qualify for super saver free shipping.